By Silvia Mordini
“Kindness is not a luxury, it is a necessity. Maybe if we treat each other, and our planet a little better, we can survive, even thrive.”
When giving a lecture near the end of his life, author Aldous Huxley said, “People often ask me what is the most effective technique for transforming their life. It is a little embarrassing that after years and years of research and experimentation, I have to say that the best answers is – just be a little kinder.”
Kindness requires less energy. Grudges are draining because they feed distracted energy which becomes wasted in worry, resentment, suspicion and criticism. If we call our energy back to us by being a little kinder self-transformation happens faster. Most of all self-kindness will change your life.
Here are three key ways kindness promotes personal growth and transformation:
- Kindness heals. Studies show that being kind is a healthy response to most any situation and at the same time positively influences our capacity to heal. Studies demonstrate children thrive when treated with kindness, when facing illness patients progress their healing more quickly. And as adults in our day to day lives kindness is the antidote to stress.
- Truly successful people are kind. Having only money doesn’t equate to success. I’m talking about someone who knows how to give and receive love, lives joyfully, and attracts abundance through unselfish acts of kindness. When I gave the eulogy at my Father’s funereal what I was most impressed by was how many people told me that he was a kind person. “Every day our eulogies are being written. Only you can develop the content for your forthcoming eulogy.” (From Winners Never Cheat). Think about what sort of legacy you want to be remembered for? How would you describe success?
- Kindness gives meaning to our lives. Kindness isn’t flashy. It doesn’t get reported on in print or tv as much as violence, war and depression. And in spite of these things humans keep evolving because of kindness because it makes us value our lives. “It is tremendously important that we try to make something positive of our lives. We were not born for the purpose of causing trouble and harming others. For our life to be of value, we need to foster and nurture such basic good human qualities as warmth, kindness and compassion. If we can do that, our lives will become meaningful, happier and more peaceful; we will make a positive contribution to the world around us.” – His Holiness the Dalai Lama
When we are healed and living meaningful lives, abundance flourishes and success is manifested in all ways. It may be a bit less complicated than what we make it out to be. The answer to a happier life lies in our innate power to be kind starting with being 10% kinder to yourself. We cannot afford letting the negative habit of beating ourselves up to continue. The easiest most real solution for supporting personal growth is the one you are empowered to deliver to yourself: giving yourself a break, cutting yourself some slack and being kinder in your thoughts and actions towards you. Love yourself, love your day, love your life! Silvia